"I felt dissatisfied in my marriage. So I suggested we introduce polyamory."

Mamma Mia

“It’s this part of polyamory that I find most fascinating, most liberating – while I do not know how I’ll feel as our comfort zone of each other expands to fold in other people, I do know that I have the tools for dealing with those feelings in a healthy way. Instead of falling prey to societal conditioning, I am looking at the vastness of my internal world and asking the hard questions. Why does this make you sad? What are you afraid of? Is this really how you feel? What’s underneath that feeling?”

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Source: ncsf

NCSF Thanks! 2nd Quarter Donation Report

NCSF thanks Winter Fire Dark Odyssey for raising a total of $14,416 for charitable causes. $6,550 was raised at NCSF’s Annual Reception and an additional $7,866 was raised for three beneficiaries—NCSF, Network La/Red and the Baltimore Transgender Alliance.


NCSF thanks J. Tebias, NCSF Board Member, for donating $1,685 to NCSF raised at his Taco’s & Tequila fundraiser by Bulge.


NCSF thanks Jaiya, an NCSF Coalition Partner, for donating $1,435 to the NCSF Foundation during the second quarter of 2019!


NCSF thanks James Dunyak, NCSF’s New England Advocate, for donating $600 to the NCSF Foundation from April-June, 2019!


Thank you to Dark Odyssey Events for donating $500 in June to support our Northwest Consent Summit happening on October 5th and 6th in Portland, OR.


Thank you to the Cavaliers Leather & Levi Club, a Coalition Partner of NCSF, for donating $400 in June as their CP fundraiser.


NCSF thanks Pittsburgh Bridge, an NCSF Coalition Partner, for donating $192 in June as their CP fundraiser with funds raised via silent auction at Spring Fever 2019.


Thank you to Off the Cuffs Podcast, an NCSF Coalition Partner, for donating $203 through their Facebook Birthday Fundraiser in April.


NCSF thanks Manifest4U for donating $100 on April 4th to support our SouthEast Consent Summit.


NCSF thanks David K. Igasaki for donating $100 to the NCSF Foundation while attending International Mr. Leather in May.


Also a big Thank You to all of our donors who prefer to remain anonymous!

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Source: ncsf

Incident Reporting & Response – 2nd Quarter 2019 Report

By Susan Wright, Director of IRR


NCSF’s Incident Reporting & Response received 43 reports & requests for assistance from individuals, groups and businesses in April, May and June 2019. This is similar to the 41 requests received in the 1st Quarter of 2019. NCSF maintains the confidentiality of those who come to us for help, however we balance that need with the need to report the services we are providing and to provide the community with a record of where the need is the greatest.


Here is a breakdown of the cases we dealt with in the 2nd Quarter of 2019:



13 groups or people dealing with groups requested resources, almost half the number in the 1st Quarter of 2019:

  • 3 groups were dealing with incorporation and zoning
  • 2 groups were dealing with a media incident
  • 2 groups were asking about presenters/organizers or reporting they had banned someone
  • 2 groups asked for resources on dealing with a consent incident or proactively creating a consent policy
  • 1 group was raided by law enforcement during an Age Play party
  • 1 group was dealing with a possible subpoena for membership
  • 1 person asked about how to deal with being banned by a group
  • 1 person reported being outed by their group that banned them


There were 10 requests by professionals or for referrals to kink and polyamory aware professionals, similar to the 1st Quarter of 2019:

  • 4 people needed referrals to kink and polyamory aware professionals
  • 4 professionals needed resources, research, stats and the definition of BDSM
  • 2 kink educators wanted to know about possible liability risks


There were 9 requests, twice as many as in the 1st Quarter of 2019:

  • 2 people needed attorneys for incorporating a new club or foundation
  • 2 sex workers were threatened with doxing or outing
  • 2 sex workers needed attorney or insurance referrals
  • 1 transgender polyamorous person has an HOA that says that their two partners can’t live with them
  • 1 teacher was fired for doing BDSM with former student
  • 1 person asked about how to ask for a welfare check for a transgender person


There were 5 requests for resources and information involving criminal legal matters, compared to 3 in the 1st Quarter of 2019: 

  • 3 people requested resources and referrals for attorneys to assist in defending themselves against criminal accusations of obstructing an officer or needed an expert witness to explain Age Play or Breath Play
  • 2 requests came from people who reported a sexual assault or death threats

Child Custody

There were 6 requests for resources and referrals for family court attorneys, compared to 2 in the 1st Quarter of 2019:

  • 4 involved kink (1 involved Age Play)
  • 2 involved kink and nonmonogamy


Supporting Members

Source: ncsf